Yes it's true ... It's time for that yearly reflection on the life that is and was 2011!
What a year!
I got married - without the law backing us up, but with family who love and support us. The reception will be next year, as the circumstances surrounding the wedding weren't entirely the most joyful ... no, I wasn't knocked up but wow that would have solved a lot of future problems, lol
My father (not-) in law passed away and it felt and still feels as though a lot of the world has come to a screeching halt. We deal with it the only way we know how, and some days are better then others.
I left a job that was not so slowly crushing my soul and now have a job where I get to embrace the crazier, more joyful side of myself ... I'm so utterly looking forward to working in the baby baby room next year with two other wonderful people.
We moved into a house we love, no longer surrounded by abuse and the smell of pot. And I daily face demons of the past to embrace a healthier and happier version of myself.
So, to you 2011 ... thank you for the joys and steps in a happy future, goodbye to the demons of the year that have tortured it ...
Why hello 2012 ... I didn't see you there
:-D
Neen
xx
Friday, December 30, 2011
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Melissa
Yesterday I found out that Melissa Etheridge is finally touring in Australia next year, the tickets going on sale next week. I'm so excited, but it seems so trivial to just say that I love her, and her music, or that I idolise the woman.
There is so much more than that.
When I was 12 years old, my life was set to change forever. I realised that I was a lesbian, I realised at the same time that my life would not be an easy road to travel ... I was gay, living in a small country town where near half the population were cousins or other such relatives, being brought up to believe in the beliefs of the Mormon religion. I found the voice and music and the amazing strength of Melissa Etheridge.
Since then, I have leant on her, cried with her and found a companion in a stranger who has helped me to believe in myself and even more importantly, despite the trials I have been put against in my life, after all of that I still believe in this world, and love and happiness!
Thank you Melissa, I can't wait to pay tribute to you in person
Neen
There is so much more than that.
When I was 12 years old, my life was set to change forever. I realised that I was a lesbian, I realised at the same time that my life would not be an easy road to travel ... I was gay, living in a small country town where near half the population were cousins or other such relatives, being brought up to believe in the beliefs of the Mormon religion. I found the voice and music and the amazing strength of Melissa Etheridge.
Since then, I have leant on her, cried with her and found a companion in a stranger who has helped me to believe in myself and even more importantly, despite the trials I have been put against in my life, after all of that I still believe in this world, and love and happiness!
Thank you Melissa, I can't wait to pay tribute to you in person
Neen
Monday, October 31, 2011
It Begins
NaNoWriMo has begun in all it's traditional glory ... I've already nearly finished the days word count and I am so very very excited.
Sewing Words Together is now offically on hold for the next 30 days.
I LOVE the insanity that is my November writing craziness.
:-)
Sewing Words Together is now offically on hold for the next 30 days.
I LOVE the insanity that is my November writing craziness.
:-)
Saturday, October 1, 2011
NaNoWriMo
Oh yeah, it's nearing once again ... I can't wait ... the month of literary abandon ... for those around my daily life, I must ask your patience and forgiveness for even stranger and more erratic behaviour and sleeplessness for the month of November ... for any others who read this ... I encourage you to put on the crazy hat and join me in the bizzarre annual tradition
:-)
Neen
:-)
Neen
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Introduction
I have been informed that my talking about Sewing Words Together without actually sharing any of it is quite indeed a tease ... I admit, I don't mind being a tease, but for the whole 2 of you who read this here goes nothing ...
THE INTRODUCTION OF SEWING WORDS TOGETHER
INTRODUCTION:
She stands against the wall, her hands behind her bottom between the dirty glass and the pretty dress, just like mummy told her to. She’s nearly six and today is daddy’s birthday so they have come again to visit. The room is small and there aren’t enough seats and so she stands against the wall and waits. Her coins are all ready, in her sticky hands, and her jacket with the pockets and her doll and her drawing for daddy are all tucked away safely in the locker. She looks around at the other visitors and worries if the locker will really be tough enough. It’s not right for dolly to be locked away in a cold dark room all by herself. Sunshine knows that the picture for daddy will keep dolly company but she frets over her one eyed dirty mould of plastic.
Mummy is sitting between two other women. They are all talking, but mummy keeps looking over at the small girl. She is too small for her age, fragile and delicate looking, which makes people treat her much younger then she thought she should be.
Sunshine stays quiet and smiles only a little at mummy when their eyes catch each others. Mummy is big in the tummy with her baby brother or sister. She hopes for a baby brother, the girls at school are horrible and she doesn’t want one of them. Her baby brother would be so loved and played with; Sunshine was already learning how to make bottles up. The lady at the hospital last week showed Sunshine how to make sure the milk is warm enough, while Mummy was outside having a ciggie.
At last they start letting the people in, but as always it’s a long and slow journey. They check everyone’s clothing and run the thing over their outline, that doesn’t actually touch you. And then you know it’s all okay when they give your hands a wash so you don’t give any germs to daddy and his friends. People all around Mummy and Sunshine are talking, but Sunshine still stays quiet, she learnt that was best. She interlocks her fingers with Mummy’s once her hands have been washed and they walk along the line toward where daddy is waiting. She hears someone yelling at the men with the hand washing cloth but she closes her eyes and squeezes mummy’s hand tighter. Mummy squeezes back and they continue to follow the yellow painted line.
It’s the last time she will see her daddy, but of course she doesn’t know that. At first she is shy and nervous. All of daddy’s friends look at her weird and she doesn’t like it. She hates having to visit daddy here and only here. He is bigger in the tummy, just like mummy but she crawls up onto his lap, wraps her arms around his chubby neck and rubs her face in his bristly beard.
Daddy laughs and is playing with her and bouncing her on his knee. She laughs and he tickles her so much that she gasps for air between the giggles. Mummy stops them, but Sunshine is ok with that, because daddy’s friends are finished looking at them and are all too busy with their own visitors.
“I drew you a picture, but it’s in the locker. You can get it later.” She beams at him, her daddy.
“Oh that’s lovely of you Sunshine. Why don’t you tell me all about it? What’s the picture of?”
And she describes it in detail, and he asks question after question about her life and her drawing and she feels warmed from the inside out. His little Sunshine.
The questions start to peter out and she knows that soon it will be the grown up time to talk and kiss. Daddy goes and gets her a can of purple fizzy and a chocolate bar. She likes it when her teacher calls them candy, everything is candy to her. Lollies and chocolate, it’s all candy. She likes candy. So while she pretends not to listen to her parents talking she enjoys her purple and her candy and hears again how sorry daddy is. That’s why she doesn’t understand why he can’t come home yet. He’s said sorry, like a hundred times. Every time she is there he says it to mummy and she bets he says it when mummy visits without her as well.
THE INTRODUCTION OF SEWING WORDS TOGETHER
INTRODUCTION:
She stands against the wall, her hands behind her bottom between the dirty glass and the pretty dress, just like mummy told her to. She’s nearly six and today is daddy’s birthday so they have come again to visit. The room is small and there aren’t enough seats and so she stands against the wall and waits. Her coins are all ready, in her sticky hands, and her jacket with the pockets and her doll and her drawing for daddy are all tucked away safely in the locker. She looks around at the other visitors and worries if the locker will really be tough enough. It’s not right for dolly to be locked away in a cold dark room all by herself. Sunshine knows that the picture for daddy will keep dolly company but she frets over her one eyed dirty mould of plastic.
Mummy is sitting between two other women. They are all talking, but mummy keeps looking over at the small girl. She is too small for her age, fragile and delicate looking, which makes people treat her much younger then she thought she should be.
Sunshine stays quiet and smiles only a little at mummy when their eyes catch each others. Mummy is big in the tummy with her baby brother or sister. She hopes for a baby brother, the girls at school are horrible and she doesn’t want one of them. Her baby brother would be so loved and played with; Sunshine was already learning how to make bottles up. The lady at the hospital last week showed Sunshine how to make sure the milk is warm enough, while Mummy was outside having a ciggie.
At last they start letting the people in, but as always it’s a long and slow journey. They check everyone’s clothing and run the thing over their outline, that doesn’t actually touch you. And then you know it’s all okay when they give your hands a wash so you don’t give any germs to daddy and his friends. People all around Mummy and Sunshine are talking, but Sunshine still stays quiet, she learnt that was best. She interlocks her fingers with Mummy’s once her hands have been washed and they walk along the line toward where daddy is waiting. She hears someone yelling at the men with the hand washing cloth but she closes her eyes and squeezes mummy’s hand tighter. Mummy squeezes back and they continue to follow the yellow painted line.
It’s the last time she will see her daddy, but of course she doesn’t know that. At first she is shy and nervous. All of daddy’s friends look at her weird and she doesn’t like it. She hates having to visit daddy here and only here. He is bigger in the tummy, just like mummy but she crawls up onto his lap, wraps her arms around his chubby neck and rubs her face in his bristly beard.
Daddy laughs and is playing with her and bouncing her on his knee. She laughs and he tickles her so much that she gasps for air between the giggles. Mummy stops them, but Sunshine is ok with that, because daddy’s friends are finished looking at them and are all too busy with their own visitors.
“I drew you a picture, but it’s in the locker. You can get it later.” She beams at him, her daddy.
“Oh that’s lovely of you Sunshine. Why don’t you tell me all about it? What’s the picture of?”
And she describes it in detail, and he asks question after question about her life and her drawing and she feels warmed from the inside out. His little Sunshine.
The questions start to peter out and she knows that soon it will be the grown up time to talk and kiss. Daddy goes and gets her a can of purple fizzy and a chocolate bar. She likes it when her teacher calls them candy, everything is candy to her. Lollies and chocolate, it’s all candy. She likes candy. So while she pretends not to listen to her parents talking she enjoys her purple and her candy and hears again how sorry daddy is. That’s why she doesn’t understand why he can’t come home yet. He’s said sorry, like a hundred times. Every time she is there he says it to mummy and she bets he says it when mummy visits without her as well.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Sickness delays the writer
I've been terribly sick almost consistently for the last coming on 7 weeks now and it's been hard to even think about writing, but today I managed a little more of my version 2.1 of Sewing Words Together. Although I haven't been able to put full sentences down, I have been thinking a lot about the progression that I am taking with this story. I'm a little in love with it. I think this may be come a problem, but that's when I call in my lovely writing guru's to scan over it.
Sewing Words Together 2.1: 3127
Sewing Words Together 2.1: 3127
Friday, August 26, 2011
Research adventures
I have discovered that there are two major research adventures I feel in desperate need of persuing in order to truly give Sewing Words Together the detail and beauty and grit that it deserves.
Adventure 1: A road trip from Brisbane down to Melbourne ... This requires me to finally get my license.
Adventure 2: A day spent in the book cafe I have semi used as a place for a large aspect of Sunshine's existence ... this requires a day off during the week and may take a lot of fenangiling with the Director at work
I like having goals.
Adventure 1: A road trip from Brisbane down to Melbourne ... This requires me to finally get my license.
Adventure 2: A day spent in the book cafe I have semi used as a place for a large aspect of Sunshine's existence ... this requires a day off during the week and may take a lot of fenangiling with the Director at work
I like having goals.
Clean Slate
I have started to write my second draft of Sewing Words Together. It was a big decision to make, and I ummed and ahed about it for over two weeks before I finally took the big step.
The reason it was such a hard task to begin, was because while the major theme and characters have mostly retained their integrity and unshininess, a few have changed and so has the perspective. I am now writing the current timeframe in first person and Sunshine's past snapshots in the third.
It's feeling a lot more genuine to her journey ... here's hoping it pans out.
The reason it was such a hard task to begin, was because while the major theme and characters have mostly retained their integrity and unshininess, a few have changed and so has the perspective. I am now writing the current timeframe in first person and Sunshine's past snapshots in the third.
It's feeling a lot more genuine to her journey ... here's hoping it pans out.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Coming Together
It is so utterly coming together. I love it ... I can feel myself wanting to edit and criticise but I'm forcing myself out of bad stop habits ... It's feeling wonderful ...
Sewing Words Together: Word count 10008
Sewing Words Together: Word count 10008
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
New Beginnings
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Today was my first official day of unemployment. I had an interview this afternoon and OMG I really want to get this job. It would be so fantastic and if I get it they already know just how bubbly and nuts I am :-)
I have been really wanting to put some more effort into my writing and found out that Olvar Woods is running this Masterclass Series to help push writers and it would be fantastic but there is no way I can justify it without having a job, but instead of getting upset I am going to simply push myself. It's harder but seeing as I've been pushing myself already so much lately with truly grasping the beauty of life, I know I can do it.
I got this beautiful journal and pen from work colleagues when I left and I'm going to start using it for journalistic means. Not like the journals I always started and never wrote in more than a few times. It's a whatever I want it to be journal. Random scraps of life that mean living to me.
Today was my first official day of unemployment. I had an interview this afternoon and OMG I really want to get this job. It would be so fantastic and if I get it they already know just how bubbly and nuts I am :-)
I have been really wanting to put some more effort into my writing and found out that Olvar Woods is running this Masterclass Series to help push writers and it would be fantastic but there is no way I can justify it without having a job, but instead of getting upset I am going to simply push myself. It's harder but seeing as I've been pushing myself already so much lately with truly grasping the beauty of life, I know I can do it.
I got this beautiful journal and pen from work colleagues when I left and I'm going to start using it for journalistic means. Not like the journals I always started and never wrote in more than a few times. It's a whatever I want it to be journal. Random scraps of life that mean living to me.
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